Better Relationships = Better Workers: Relationships Don’t Just Benefit the People in Them


Photo By Aleksandr Simonov | Adobe Stock

Everybody’s heard the term “work-life balance,” and it’s become a more important concept as our understanding of business evolves. Study after study has proven that productivity and even the overall success of an organization can be negatively affected if you have an office full of unhappy, stressed-out workers. Like most people, you might think of issues like friends and family time, personal errands, and hobbies as the most important things you need to make time for to hit that delicate balance. But I’m here to tell you there’s another element most men don’t think about — finding the woman of your dreams.

Helping you find your special person is what I do for a living, and for professional men who also run a business, a lasting romantic relationship can trickle down into their workforce. How can this be true? Sociology and psychology bring forth the answers. For example, one scientific paper shows that when you’re happy in your life, your social capital increases — including as a leader. In other words, the happier you are, the more it spreads to everything you touch. And yes, of course, finding the woman of your dreams is a piece of that puzzle.

I know this from personal experience because I’m working all the time to build self-confidence for professional men who struggle to approach women. When we lack that essential partnership in life, which comes from an intimate emotional level connection, it can show in other relationships. Think about it: You’re not happy, you feel out of balance, and you struggle to speak confidently from a position of leadership. And that can affect your team — even if your business is to play professional basketball. You don’t have your head in the game, the game starts slipping through your fingers, and everyone under you falls like dominoes.

The simple equation here is Better Relationships = Better Workers. You’re arousing interest in women to meet your own needs while positively affecting every other aspect of your life. When I coach men on how to approach women organically, I recognize that it’s part of a holistic strategy to improve their love life and their enterprise. After all, in purpose, we find happiness. Yes, your business is certainly a part of your purpose. But we humans are emotional animals, and we cannot expect work to meet every one of our emotional needs.

A lot of things from healthy relationships trickle into workplace functions. Learning relationship trust, arousing interest, and other elements we might think about, whether we’re online dating or deep into a new relationship, apply just as critically in a well-run business. Even if you feel like everything is going great at your office on paper, a deeper look might show something else. A Harvard Business Review article reveals a lot about the connection between the happiness of a leader and the bottom line. If you’re communicating effectively with your employees and noticing many of them aren’t as vibrant as you would expect, your lack of exuberance may be playing an outsized role. So yes, your romantic fulfillment can influence how the people you supervise feel on the job.

Look, I get it. It can be hard for men who are nervous around a woman to figure out what to do about it. I work on this with clients all the time. Men’s struggles in the relationship-seeking arena are real. Capturing women’s attention isn’t always easy, and when it doesn’t work out the way we want it to, every other life goal can start to feel equally elusive. The effects can be subtle. You might not even realize how all of this affects the team. My job is to get you to be more confident with women.

By improving the conversation in your intimate relationships, you can learn to attract the right partner or even simply be more confident with women. My approach to these men’s issues includes learning how to be more mindful — another skill that will translate into how you interact with your staff. Everything is connected! Concepts like work-life balance aren’t just a fad. It’s a deeper understanding of the lives we need to construct for ourselves to achieve a sense of fulfillment and self-actualization. Relationship coaching is life coaching. I’ve understood this for a long time. And now, we’ve got good studies backing that up as well.